By becoming better acquainted, though, you might find some room for common ground. Getting to know someone generally starts with the simple act of listening to what they say. Many introverts do this already, so try to take it a step further and offer something in return.
Many of them love — and even encourage — spontaneous socializing, because people time tends to give them energy, not drain it. However, unexpected visitors do not sit well with us introverts. Generally speaking, we need advanced notice to mentally prepare to chat and be with people. And, to us, our home is our refuge away from the noisy world, a private space where we can let down our guard and relax.
How They Show They Care (even If It’s Quietly)
It can also help to consider that most people wait for someone else to initiate conversations and friendships, even extroverts! Learning how to start a conversation about day-to-day things like the weather or local events can help you master how to be friendly as an introvert. Making new connections as an introvert isn’t about changing who you are, it’s about using your natural empathy and depth to make connections that count. Your approach to friends might look different from others and that’s totally cool. This thoughtful approach to friendship makes you uniquely able to make some of the most meaningful friendships possible.
Understanding these distinctions allows both of you to embrace each other’s preferences, creating a more harmonious friendship. Identify activities that both you and the introvert enjoy. Explore hobbies like reading, playing board games, or hiking. Suggest joining a book club or a local walking group. These environments often feel more comfortable for introverts, allowing for deeper conversation Latinfeels sign up & login without overwhelming social pressures. You could bring up specific interests you know they share.
True friendship does require effort, and success can take time. And at the end of the day, you’re still the same person with the same needs for solitude. Making friends doesn’t mean you have to completely reinvent your true self. Putting up a pretense of extroversion might seem like the best way to “fake it until you make it,” but this could backfire. You might instinctively avoid these interactions for fear of being put on the spot for small talk.
Ask Yourself: Do You Want Friends, Or Do You Believe You Should Have Some?
Rejection hurts, so if someone else makes the first move, you know they probably like you enough to want to reach out and be friends. Fully embody those strengths you’ve identified, and kindred spirited introverts will find you. Or perhaps an extrovert will adopt you since your valuable personality traits complement theirs. Sure, an introvert may come across as being shy because they are more reflective, they check out a situation before taking action, and they are usually quieter.
If you expect improvements, you might unconsciously work harder to bring them about. Everyone, especially those who wanted to be more extroverted, showed improvements in well-being during the extroverted week. During the introverted week, their well-being went down. The important thing to realize is that everyone has different strengths.
This might be harder during the pandemic — but harder doesn’t mean impossible. Some people might consider your life severely lacking in social connections — but they aren’t you. If you don’t actually feel the need to spend time among others, that’s just fine.
Additionally, pay attention to verbal and non-verbal cues during interactions. If they seem distant, gently shift the conversation to a topic they enjoy or allow them some quiet time. Choose quieter settings where they can feel at ease, like a cozy coffee shop.
Plus, you’ll probably feel guilty that you aren’t spending enough time with all your “too many” friends. One thing introverts usually have in common is that they know the value of quality versus quantity. It’s better to have one or two friends in your inner circle than having many friends.
If you don’t have many — or any — close friends, you might wonder whether you do, in fact, spend too much time alone. Do you know what it’s like to live with an inner monologue that never shuts up? Everything we experience, we process deeply, including ideas and emotions. Our vivid inner world means we’re prone to daydreaming, suddenly going quiet, needing extra time for word retrieval, and just all-around getting lost in our own thoughts.
This can help you build stronger connections with others, whether you’re at a party, networking event, or just chatting with a new acquaintance. When you open up to others, you give them a glimpse into who you are as a person. Sharing your story, thoughts, and feelings can also help you find common ground with others who may have had similar experiences. When starting small, it’s important to keep an open mind and be willing to step out of your comfort zone a little.
- Making friends as an introvert can feel impossible (although still probably easier than dating as an introvert).
- Honestly, for me, at least, it can be the determining factor in how far the friendship will go.
- Acknowledge their feelings and perspectives, reinforcing that their voice matters.
- When you focus on quality, you’re more likely to find individuals who share your interests, values, and passions.
Too many friendships will tire you out, but you’ll have energy and time to invest in a quality friendship (or two). One of the most common misconceptions about introverts is that they don’t like people or social interaction and have poor social skills. Introverts just prefer to interact with people one-on-one or in small groups. They find large crowds and parties to be mentally draining and often prefer to stay home instead. Unlike extroverts, we introverts probably won’t text you multiple times a day — or even every day. Our quietness doesn’t mean we’ve forgotten about you.
It is how we recharge after different activities. Usually, I get some alone time in at night just before bedtime. Other introverts may require several periods of alone time during the day.
Making Friends As An Introvert: Building Connections In Your Own Way
When you feel a bit more comfortable, connect with someone. Don’t spend too much time analyzing conversations or worrying about saying the wrong thing. Focus on the moment and enjoy your time with friends. Friendships are vital for our mental and emotional health and are a key element of happiness. Studies show that people with strong social relationships are happier, healthier, and live longer. So if you want to improve your overall well-being, making friends should be one of your top priorities.
Learn the reasons behind these feelings and explore healthy ways to cope and heal your relationship. Connecting online allows you to engage at your own pace and interact with others who share your interests, helping conversations flow naturally without pressure. According to psychologist Laurie Helgoe, introverts process the world differently than extroverts. Many introverts are often misunderstood, but science shows that their brains actually respond differently to social stimulation. Plus, you can only have real, deep friendships when you are unequivocally yourself.
Avoid overwhelming them with constant invitations or demands for interaction. Instead, initiate plans while allowing them to decline. Social apps are also great for maintaining new friendships you’ve made online or in the real world. When thinking about how to make friends online as an introvert, it’s wise to focus on social platforms designed to foster connections.
With the Do Happy App, you can remember all the important dates and details about your friends that make them special to you. The app sends reminders of your friends’ birthdays and special occasions, so you reach out when it’s important. Also, help them celebrate their special occasions and any small wins they have!
By joining these groups, you can connect with like-minded individuals and build friendships with people who share your passions. Finding enjoyable activities with introverts enhances your friendship. Focus on low-key hangouts and creative outings that cater to their preferences. When you know what to expect and have established clear friendship routines, you’ll feel more comfortable and you won’t feel so drained. Being an active participant (asking AND answering questions) in the conversation leads to more meaningful friendships. This falls under the people-pleasing umbrella and makes any friendship one-sided, which isn’t fair on your extroverted friend or person.
Take a peek at a local newspaper to see if there are any groups that meet regularly for a game night, games of dart, ultimate frisbee, hiking – whatever it may be. It’s easier to bridge the gap between strangers when you already have something in common. A bit of space, a bit of patience—that’s all they really need. Have you ever had a friend who doesn’t always reply fast? Speaking for myself, if I’ve starved myself of enough social contact, sometimes I can be the life of the party.